Dating a guy with different values

Added: Logan Bouknight - Date: 03.05.2022 08:04 - Views: 12983 - Clicks: 9727

And regardless of how similar you and your partner may appear, each family is its own culture. This means that every relationship is in some ways a melding of two cultures. Even if you and your partner share similar beliefs and values, your families of origin may be different in surprising ways. Differences in values can be obvious, but they can also be subtle. This may not appear like a difference in values—and it may not be one. But something as simple as a difference in family size can reflect a value; specifically, how big you hope your own family will be someday.

However, when looking at your extended family maybe you notice a common family size—your parents, grandparents, and many of your aunts and uncles had large or small families. In a dating relationship, it might seem awkward to discuss how many children you hope to have. Another important issue that might not at first appear as a difference in values is your beliefs about gender roles—what tasks man and woman in a relationship generally take on. For example, maybe your mom was a stay-at-home mom, and you hope to do the same once you have kids.

Or, you may have every intent and desire to continue with your career once you have children, while your partner comes from a family with a stay-at-home mom and thinks that his future wife will stay home as well. A conversation about gender roles and expectations can help each of you shed light on your values in this area. A more obvious difference between partners may be dissimilar faith traditions or religious beliefs or lack thereof. While inter-religious relationships happen often, the couple should be aware of how differences in their faith inform differences in their values.

Differences in religious and spiritual beliefs can affect everything from how you spend your mornings to how you plan to raise any children you might have. This conversation led her to verbalize that she liked the weekly tradition of doing something together as a family like her family did by going to church. From this conversation, the topic of how they would navigate religion and spirituality with children surfaced something they had not discussed before.

Another telling question is to ask your partner how his faith or lack thereof shows up in or informs his daily life and share your answer, too. A discussion about each of your families of origin is wise in any relationship, especially as it gets serious. Simply discussing what both of your experiences were like growing up in homes with one versus two parents is a great place to start.

This may include what each of you learned explicitly or implicitly about marriage, conflict management , and co-parenting. Of course, siblings can vary drastically in their individual values and lifestyles regardless of being raised in the same home and by the same parents. A good way to start is to simply ask your partner about his opinion: for example, what he thinks of his brother living with his girlfriend. How do you picture your family down the road? How many children? What role would you have, ideally; what role would your spouse have, ideally?

How does your faith influence your daily life, and how do you see it influencing you in the future? Your family background and your experiences in your family of origin are unique to you, and not every difference need be a dealbreaker. But verbalizing the values you hold on to—whether you realized it before or not—can help you understand what is important to you in a spouse, and if your partner shares those values, too.

Preserving our relationships and our physical and mental health. Home Relationships. Finding the differences in your values in unexpected places Differences in values can be obvious, but they can also be subtle. The big questions: faith traditions and family values A more obvious difference between partners may be dissimilar faith traditions or religious beliefs or lack thereof.

Which are not? What do you think of my traditions, beliefs, values, and family and what do I think of yours? By William McKenna, M. By Patty Breen. By Maria Walley. By Kelsey T. Chun, MFT. By Zach Brittle.

Dating a guy with different values

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